I'm the type of corny that defines words in posts... Glowing- Exuberant, radiant; To shine brightly and steadily, especially without a flame.
I just like for people to understand what I'm saying...it's no insult to your personal intelligence at all. I promise. Just the type corny I am.
I've been a curly sue since yesterday. I love curls! That was one reason I wanted to go natural...but my natural hair isn't curly at all, I really don't know how to describe my natural hair and I'm not going natural anymore...okay I see a digression coming on. Let me quit while I'm ahead. Like I said I love curls! This look I got from doing what some refer to as bantu knots...Jamaicans call them Chiney bumps. Wish I could tell you why or the origin of those terms but...I haven't the slightest clue.
So I'm glowing despite everything going on I'm shining brightly and steadily.
Everything going on. Let me define that.
My family was here with me for a few days and we had a great time together. I had to balance work and other responsibilities as well as enjoy the time I did have with them and it was successful, for the most part. Of course there were some rough patches that arose in trying to maintain that balance but nothing that I wasn't able to work through. My family left and of course that can leave a girl feeling a little bummed but I'm in great hands! My ABBA is always looking out for me and he's also allowed me to be found by this amazing gentleman who is constantly going out of his way to make sure I'm okay. I could say more on that but I want to continue on...
Yeah, so my car is in dire straits. It's not working at the moment. Turns out I need an alternator. Booooo! And I need to have my low beam headlights installed. And I need new brakes and brake roters - just dandy. And because everything with the car decided to go haywire all at once, I can't tell a lie, I wanted to have a moment yesterday. But my guy was there to remind me that in life this kind of stuff is bound to happen and everything will be taken care of in due time.
And since then...
I've been glowing! Life is tough but I'm tougher. My ABBA made me that way. And being tough doesn't mean going it alone to prove that you're tough either. Life is lived in community for a reason! And I'm thankful for the community I have here. I haven't been here a year yet but already I've met some caring and dependable people who have no problem helping me out if it's within their power to.
I think that's the key to my glowing! Being thankful. It's truly made all the difference.
Even at work, I was beginning to get fed up but remembering how God made a way out of no way for me to be there was enough to overwhelm me with gratefulness and through that I've discovered I can choose to be content. I can truly say I'm content with my current work situation. Where there is room for improvement I will work to improve it, rather than abandon my word to jump ship with the disgruntled others.
I may not have a new flame or new spark or new thing to set me on fire all over again but I'll keep glowing because of all I have already been given.
As a wise man said yesterday - "Contentment is not having more, contentment is wanting less." When he says things like that, which is very regularly AND models that out, it makes loving him so much easier even when it isn't easy. He's definitely one of the many things I'm thankful for.
At any given moment there can be so much fighting to distract us. Unfortunately, too many times we've made nit-picking and finding things to complain about our habit of choice. Let's give our hearts a workout and exercise our ability to be grateful. Be thankful on purpose.That's the only way to glow.
Before I call it quits on this post...
Let me share one other random tidbit. I'm coming to absolutely adore holding hands!
I never used to be big on PDA. And for me, the definition of PDA was hand holding...kissing, in public, oh em gee that would NEVER happen that wasn't even a plausible option. LOL. Maybe it was the tomboy in me but PDA? I would pass, no thank you. I would only hold hands if I thought a guy would be absolutely insulted in the worst way if I declined (that was the people pleaser I used to be, the girl who had a hard time saying no because she was worried about offending people). In those few cases where I did participate I felt absolutely nothing, no emotional connection, certainly no lovey-dovey feelings, no interest at all...Oops? *shrugs*
I realize now that I did all of that on purpose. It was either make hand holding an ultra big deal (omg our hands are having sex in public) or make it no big deal (this.means.nothing). And for a long time I refused to make it a matter of significance.
In reality for the girl with the choux pastry heart (me) holding hands with a man is a VERY big deal and it has everything to do with my relationship with my father. My pops used to hold my hand a lot when I was a little girl. In fact if we were out and I wanted something and tried to throw a tantrum about getting my way he would just have to squeeze my little tiny hand because he was already holding it. To this day I can play that mercy game with a guy and they can squeeze my hand and rub my knuckles together and it won't hurt. My father made me immune to that lol.
When my daddy was holding my hand it meant a number of things...it meant I was being led (by the head of the household), I knew I was protected, and although I didn't always get my way, I knew my daddy always had my best interest at heart.
So essentially, for me, if hand holding is done right, there should be loads of meaning attached to it. And now, once again there is. So if you see me out and about with my boyfriend (oh how I loathe that word but for a lack of something better or more creative let's just go with that *sigh*)...and you see us holding hands...know that, it means that I'm allowing this man to lead me because I trust the God in him, I feel protected with him and I know he has my best interests at heart.
Hahaha because I don't know what else to say to end that post and that just seems SO vulnerable lol
Keep glowing! Live life with a heart wide open! And above all love God and people!!
Grace and Peace to you my pilgrim friends!